Money Talks 2

Hey all! So I wrote this in an email last Thursday. Sorry my delinquency in posting it, and THANK YOU to everyone who has prayed! Please continue to pray! We are hosting a fund-raiser this Sunday, here in Kenya. We want the money from this fund-raiser to go to:
- Begin funding sustainability projects
- Pay John and Nancy's salaries (at least something!)
- Buy food for the kids
- Cover rent for the next 3 months (and this month!)
- Pay for school fees for the kids to go to extra tutoring so they can get into High School (half of the kids last year didn't because of low test scores, i.e. half of the kids in the entire school!)
- Paying daily costs for AMCC, phone bills, transportation costs, etc...

So we're basically wanting God to move in people here and for a fair amount of money to come in (Around $800 would be awesome, twice that would be better, ten times that would be best. :-). Please join us in praying for God to move in people's hearts, get them safely to AMCC, and to only give if He tells them to.

Here's the recent update about money talks:

Yesterday, when Nancy and I came together for staff prayer (which
we want to happen every day but has happened 15% of the time, that's
frustrating for Nick and I) I asked her how she was feeling. She said
she was feeling well and was encouraged, and I followed up by saying
that sometimes Nick and I feel that we have been more of a burden to
she and John than a help. We've felt this way because we know that
they were expecting us to be coming with lots of money and we have
come with very little to none, including their own salaries. It began
a wonderful conversation where we both shared important things, things
which were shared at a slower pace (and in a softer way) that accounts
for Kenyan culture, but which I don't want to take the time to slowly
share with you right now.
I said that:
1. Nick and I feel like it has been harder on each of you for us to be
here than when we were gone.
2. Nick and I feel bad when you share needs with us because it seems
that it is an indirect way of asking for it. This is awkward because
we have already said that we will not be giving money, and we feel
that you may be either not believing us that we won't be giving more,
or that you're trying to pressure us into it.
3. In our culture, if someone is silent about something, that
generally means that they are not happy about it. We are an expressive
people, and if we enjoy something we make sure to let others know so
that they will understand that it's not that we don't care that they
have done it, and so that they would know to repeat it!
4. Nick and I have not heard either of you say anything like "I'm glad
that you are here because now I can sleep more/rest more/have a day
off/don't have to cook all the time/don't have to walk to charge the
cell phones/etc..." The only words that we have heard are things like
"The kids will all be expecting meat on Good Friday, so what do you
think about that?" or "We will be needing house rent next Monday"
etc... and so it has seemed to us that you are not happy that we are
here and mostly wish that we would give more money.

SO, just sharing those things at all was
A. Exactly what needed to be said!
B. An amazing thing that it could be said in a non-awkard way.
C. Not a planned conversation.

Nancy's response was better than I could have imagined! She said
that basically:
1. She and John are very happy and thankful that we have come. They
tell others this often, and have not said it to us because it is not
normal in their culture to do so. But we should be sure that they are
thanking God because of our coming.
2. They not been sharing financial needs as an indirect way of asking
us for money, at least not since we've had conversations about it
(which happened explicitly last Sunday). They have shared the needs
with us because we said that we had come to share the burden with
them. So they tell us so that we will also know, and share the burden,
and pray with them.

This conversation brought so much joy into my heart, and such
freedom!!! We basically repeated the conversation today with John and
Nick present, and then allowed each of them to elaborate on it. It was
just wonderful! I felt comfortable sharing all of the different things
that I had written down as needing to be shared. They were received
well because most of them are taken care of by the understanding that
when John and Nancy share needs they are NOT asking for money in an
indirect way, it is so that we also know and can experience with them
the things that they experience and pray with them (which is pretty
much exactly what Nick and I came to do!). The main problem has been
that it seems to Nick and I like John and Nancy think that God will
only provide through us, but in conversation today I believed them
when they said that was not so.
As we prayed at the end of our talk I was giddy, truly giddy! Very
much feeling the freedom to simply be obedient and faithful to what
God has called me to and trust Him with the fruit! I am so confident
that He has called us to be here and not give money, but I have felt a
great amount of pressure to take on financial responsibilities, which
made today so sweet. It was also a very enlightening thing when I read
an email from Nancy Love (tx-kenya missionary lady) who said that Nick
and I are not the only people whom God will use to provide for them.
It clicked for me that I was believing that lie, and that's where my
feelings of responsibility were coming from. If we don't, who will?
That's what I thought, and I wasn't trusting the Lord to use someone
who was not the mzungu! So I was doing the very thing that I was
frustrated with them for doing.
I feel very free here now, and am excited to see God move!! I
believe that we are formulating good plans about how to get out of the
cycle of continually running out of money, and I believe that God will
provide in the mean time. Scripturally, He said that if we seek His
Kingdom and His righteousness first then He will provide for us (and I
think that each of us are, though imperfectly, seeking His Kingdom and
righteousness first). He has also said that He is the father to the
fatherless, and there are definitely a lot of orphans here. The way I
see it, we've got two strong scriptural passages going for us, and I
REALLY DO BELIEVE THAT HE'S GOING TO PROVIDE BECAUSE OF THESE THINGS.
I've never believed it so strongly before, and it is just a freeing
thing! I'm going to bed now knowing how He will do it, and knowing
that our rent was due 10 days ago, and we'll have to borrow food on
credit if we don't get any by Tuesday, but I just KNOW that He will
provide! We've been praying that we would grow in faith (Ryan has been
praying that for over a year, and it's been inspiring for me to see
him praying for it so consistently), and I sense that God has been
doing that in me as of late.
I feel like a big corner has been turned, as we've now clearly
spelled out the things that we are going to give money for
(sustainability projects, but ultimately whatever He tells us to) and
what we're not going to (day-to-day and recurring needs, food, rent,
salaries, talk time, matatu rides, etc...) and we are at peace about
it all. John and Nancy both elaborated that it was good for us to talk
about the differences in culture and that "surely we were doing this
because, in our place, it is the best thing to do". Mostly, I believe
them, but I'm waiting for time to fill in the last 10% of that belief.
I really think it will though, and I'm so encouraged!!! Nick and
mine's task now feels very possible, and I will feel much more
comfortable leaving Nick here when this way of relating becomes normal
and I don't sense that they'll constantly be pressuring Nick to give
money that He sense God doesn't want him to give.

So we're really happy about that! Praise God alone. He is the One who makes things like this happen. Woohoo.